Sunday, September 29, 2013


Sleepless (Bird of Stone #1)

Tracey Ward


Alex has a superpower, but not the kind you'd be excited to have. She can't control hers and it lands her all over the world unpredictably. She falls asleep in her bedroom wakes up in Paris, Ireland, Wrigley Field, or whatever other destination her power chooses at the moment. However, it's not all bad. Her power is how she meets Nick. 

Nick has a power too. He can't feel fear. It's great for his military career... sucks for his social skills.

Their relationship is a long, strange story, but trust me; YOU WANT TO HEAR IT!

First of all, the banter in this book is absolutely hilarious. Which is why reading it in public was probably a poor choice. Apparently if you are sitting at a table alone and burst out laughing over something you just read in a book people just assume that you are insane. Based on the number of times that particular situation occurred while I was reading this book, it's a miracle I wasn't committed.

I really love that Ward didn't limit the banter to just Alex and Nick. Alex's sister Cara and Nick's fellow PJ's, Walter and Campbell are all sharp and have no problems holding their own with both Nick and Alex. The banter kept the story interesting and amusing even during the heavy world and relationship building periods. Those are usually periods where I get impatient for SOMETHING to happen, but I was too amused with what all of the characters where saying and thinking to even care. That's impressive in and of itself.

As for the story itself, I loved it. I really did. Ward did a great job of creating chemistry between Alex and Nick without creating insta-love. The progression of the relationship was perfect. No “omg, he gives me the tingles and I'm in love” bs.

Ward also creates a story that is unique. It's different from anything else I've read. That is something that I don't get to say very often. A lot of times I really feel like I'm reading the same story with different characters in other YA books. It was refreshing to have a completely unique story that was all her own. Plus, it was just a really fun read.

Finally... that ending... OMG. I'm sooo dying to find out what happens next! Its definitely not the most intense cliffhanger ever, but it's intense enough. I'm a sucker for cliffhangers (i don't know why.... glutton for punishment or something like that), and I was happy with it. It left me all “NONONONO! You can't just LEAVE it like THIS! I NEED TO KNOW NOW!!!” To me, that is an ideal ending.

I didn't have huge expectations going into this book. I honestly kind of had my doubts. I'm soooo glad that I didn't let them stop me from reading this though. It's truly an awesome book, and Tracey Ward could be well on her way to becoming a favorite author of mine. 

Read it. Love it. Share it. Seriously. It's that good. 

Also... Tracey... please hurry on book two! I'm dying over here! 


Saturday, September 28, 2013

NEWSFLASH: World After (Penryn and the End of Days) by Susan Ee

For today ONLY you can grab Susan Ee's World After for pre-order on Amazon for only $1.99!  WOOT!  Get excited!  Click the picture of the cover below to go to Amazon and get your copy!  

 *happy dance*

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

The Collector

The Collector

Victoria Scott


Dante Walker is a self-absorbed prick who is one of hell's best soul collectors. He gets to assigned to collect Charlie Cooper's soul, he has 10 days. He doesn't know why the big guy downstairs wants Charlie, nor does he care. Getting her gets him a permanent ticket out of hell. Then Dante meets said Charlie, and the "quirky Nerd Alert chick," and realizes that the assignment is going to test his abilities and uncover emotions he's buried oh-so-deep in his shallow, shallow soul.

Ok. I'm not going to lie. The blurb on Goodreads didn't sound as bad. I was actually thinking this could be one of those quick, funny reads.  I was all excited when I FINALLY got it.  Then I got like 2 chapters in and was like:

I couldn't even finish it. I literally got sooo angry I had to put it down. Like serious rage mad. Like…. veins bulging on my forehead mad.

Seriously. I hate all the characters in this book. EVERY-FREAKIN-ONE!

Like... I don't even.... I'm not even... just AUGH!

First there is the male lead/love interest/resident dickhead, Dante. I've never wanted to kill a character in a book with my bare hands quite as much as wanted to kill him. 

I'm not sure that there are enough insulting words to adequately describe Dante. So we'll just say he's a shallow, self-absorbed prick who has serious ego issues, making him possibly the world's biggest ass.
Don't get me wrong. I love a bad guy (hello, Daemon Black!?). Dante is not a bad guy. He's just that asshat who wants to be and thinks if he's a ginormous enough dick to everyone they'll cower in his glorious wake.

Seriously, lets look at a few choice quotes/thoughts:

Shit he thinks about himself:

“I glance in the mirror. Surprise, surprise—I look finger-lickin’ delicious.”

"I came as Awesome Sauce," I say. "You probably wouldn't recognize it.”

"You don't know who you're fucking with, princess. Ain't no one do bad like I do.”

Shit he thinks about Charlie and her friends:

“My eyes widen at the sight of her. This is the girl Boss Man is after? She looks like a porcelain doll…beat three times with an ugly stick.”

“Her wavy hair falls to mid-waist, and I think how she looks better this way. From the back.”

“Dante, this is Annabelle.”
No. No way. That name is reserved for females with grace and elegance, not this girl. This girl is…beastly. “Annabelle,” I say. “It suits you.”

and THEN, what he thinks about people who think the same way he does about Charlie:

“How can someone be cruel to this chick? It’s like picking a fight with a chipmunk.”

How in the hell can he get mad at everyone else for doing and thinking the SAME SHIT HE DOES?!?!  Oh what?  It's okay because he doesn't straight up say it to her face.  It's not because he's not that mean.  It's just because he wants her to THINK he's a good guy so he can seal her soul.

I promise you.  If he didn't have something to gain by not being a jackass, he'd be right there with the rest of them.

I do not feel like for one minute it’s a change of heart thing with him. It's more like possessive bullying. She's his to torment, no one else’s.

I don't find the shit he says and/or thinks to be funny.  Not to mention the way it's delivered.  I felt like I needed a Douche-bag to English dictionary.

And I don't like Charlie either. Her naivety is just soooo F$*@ing annoying. She believes everything Dante tells her. Everything. She trusts everyone, even AFTER they have proven themselves completely UNTRUSTWORTHY. This has a lot to do with why she falls for the asinine pranks that the so-called “popular crowd” keep pulling on her OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

Then the whole, I'll sign my soul away to the devil so I can be pretty and that way Dante can love me. ARE YOU F'ING KIDDING ME?!

First of all, great lesson for little girls. If a man doesn't love you, sell your soul to the devil and get pretty, and then, and only then, can he love you in return. Who you are has absolutely no merit. None.

Secondly, WHO in their right mind would WANT to date a dude like Dante. I know, I know.  They are out there.  But WHY??? He's so obsessed with himself that he's just annoying. I'm all for self confidence, but Jesus.

I can only handle so many "I'm god's gift to women" epilogues, and it's not like he is really a nice guy with an ego complex.  Nothing about Dante is like-able. If he was the last man on Earth and I had to procreate with him to save the human race, humans would go extinct. No question.

The parts of the book I managed to get through just left me feeling ick. Like I felt like a bad person just for reading something so disgusting. Not to mention the serious rage rants my friends and family had to endure after I finally gave up.

I wouldn't recommend this book for anyone, especially young girls. To me it basically said that if you are having self-esteem issues because of whatever, it's because you ARE whatever, and you need to change that, or accept that you will never be anything special.

It also suggested that it's perfectly normal for someone to be rude, demeaning, controlling, demanding, and a general ass to you in a relationship. Like that's the sacrifice you have to make to be loved. BULLSHIT! 

I hate books like this. I really, really do. I think you get that. So I'm going to step down off my soapbox here and I'll just say go out and find a book with a REAL heroine in it. Don't look up to Charlie. Look up to a woman who is strong, and independent, and comfortable with herself regardless of what she looks like, no matter how tall/fat/short/skinny/pimply/whatever she is. One who demands respect and doesn't try to change herself for some guy and doesn't settle for some guy just because he showed her a little attention. There are plenty of good, strong female characters in sooo many books. 

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Crown of Midnight

Crown of Midnight

(Throne of Glass, #2)

Sarah J. Maas

5/5 stars
Admission: When I read Throne of Glass, I really liked it but I wasn’t fully hooked. After reading Crown of Midnight, well….

 You have been warned

Crown of Midnight picks up right where we left off in Throne of Glass with Celaena struggling to do her duty as the King’s Champion without sacrificing her morals (yes, even assassins have morals). She walks a fine and very deadly line between the two by faking the deaths of her chosen targets without telling even those she is closest to. But when someone from her past becomes the King’s latest target the past and the present collide with secrets and betrayal all around.

This book was an emotional rollercoaster from beginning to end. There were times when I thought about putting it down just to let myself recover and I couldn’t do it.

 Gave me emotional whiplash

This book starts off fairly gently- sure there are decapitated heads and such but for the most part things are pretty smooth. There is a lot of really great character building and that is really one of the strongest qualities of this series. As you learn more about each character’s backstory and how they have been shaped by them, it adds more layers and makes them all the more real. The dialogue and interaction between them is another strength. It never feels stilted or contrived and the banter between Celaena and Chaol had me laughing out loud at several points. Even Dorian, who I was not a big fan of going into this book, grew on me this time around. On the romance front there are some very serious squee moments and some definite resolution on her choice. No love triangle here, folks. With all the squeeing and glee over actual real, flawed characters I was lulled into a state of bliss. I probably looked something like this during this phase of the book:

Well, minus the beard and I occasionally brush my hair

Then the other shoe drops and you are just stunned. Mistakes are made, secrets are revealed, and people are hurt. You understand why everyone made the choices they did but you're still screaming at all of them.

 …or maybe that was just me

Then we finally get to see Adarlan’s assassin when all pretense of civility is stripped from her. It is a simultaneously glorious and terrifying thing to behold. She is truly a badass heroine, not one of those that talks a big game then waits for someone to come save her.

 but seriously

The big reveal at the end wasn’t much of a shock for me, it just confirmed what I already suspected but I’m still excited to see how it plays out. With all the changes going on it’s impossible to even guess what’s going to happen in the next book, but I can guarantee that I will be buying it and finding out the day it comes out. You hooked me this time, Ms. Maas.

P.S. Chaol-


Jennifer L. Armentrout

I have never in my life come so close to going into cardiac arrest while reading a book. Ever. 

Thank you Jennifer Armentrout, because of you, there is a very real possibility that I will need heart medications for the rest of my life. All because of this book.

I should probably just go ahead and buy stock in these. 

If you are reading this, I'm assuming that you have read Opal. If my assumption is wrong, I would strongly suggest you scroll down to the gif of the dancing bear. Go ahead. I'll wait.







Ok. Those of you that are still with me... you all know that the end of Opal was all like:

Because Katy got caught while trying to escape after rescuing Beth from Daedalus and Daemon didn't. So they are all separated and stuff, and that in and of itself is sad.

Add to that what we had witnessed of Beth at that point, and now you're sad and terrified. Because, although Krazy Katy has a nice ring to it, none of us want that.

It's not a good look for her.
Origin picks up where Opal left off.

Daemon is going all rage monster trying to get back to Katy.

Only waaaay sexier!

And Katy is all:

Only less whiny.

So how far will Daemon go to get her back? After what Daedalus reveals about the Luxen, will Katy still be able to trust them?

*Cue the dramatic music!!*

(Note to those that haven't read Opal: I can't tell you about Origin until you read Opal, so get on that! What is below however, should be spoiler free enough that it won't ruin it for you)

This review is really hard to write without epic spoilers, because so much happens in Origin. It's a HUGE game changer. Characters die, new characters are introduced, there are epic battles, betrayals, lots of sexy sexiness, and a CLIFFHANGER (that's right Jen, A CLIFFHANGER!!!) for an ending. OH, and did I mention that its DUAL POV, so you get to be all up in Daemon's head. Oh yeah.

So I'll just say that you should be mentally prepared. Reading Origin is like hopping on the worlds most epic emotional roller coaster. That's not a bad thing. I love that edge of my seat, can't get to the next page fast enough feeling. Origin is pretty intense though.


It's epic.

Also, a side-note that ties this book, author, and blog all together in a pretty package.

Jennifer Armentrout inspired the name of this blog.

How so you ask?

Because when she made her appearance at Decatur Book Fest, she stated during her Q&A that THIS BOOK... ORIGIN... was NOT a CLIFFHANGER!

That's right.

She says it's NOT, I repeat, NOT a cliffhanger.

So when we went back to get our books signed, I told her that I totally disagreed and that it was sooo a cliffhanger. She laughed good-naturedly, and signed my book as follows:

We were so amused, we decided to name the blog "This is Not a Cliffhanger"

So there you go.

Additionally, if you have read the book and would care to vote as to whether or not the book is, in fact, a cliffhanger, feel free to take the poll below.

Is Origin by Jennifer Armentrout a cliffhanger? free polls 

Monday, September 23, 2013

Project ELE

Project ELE

Rebecca Gober & Courtney Nuckels


A virus is wiping out man-kind. Millions are dead. Thousands more are dying. The government creates a program called Project ELE as a last ditch effort to save the human race. All remaining survivors who have not yet been infected are forced into F.E.M.A. shelters to wait it out.

Willow Mosby is a 15 year old girl. Life as she knows it ends when she walks into the shelter doors. She must adapt to the demands of shelter life, work a full time job, and make new friends.

After making a discovery, Willow and her new found friends begin exhibiting strange abilities. They embark on a mission to find out what is happening to them.

Will Willow survive?

Ok. So the first few chapters of the book had me sobbing. Seriously sobbing.

It was beautifully written and heartwrenching. I could literally feel the anguish that Willow was facing.

Once they got into the F.E.M.A. shelter I got kind of bored. I went with it though, because, ya know, world building.

Then she starts meeting her new friends, and I was like "Ok, cool, now we can do something cool"

Then nothing really happened.

Then they went on an adventure, and I was all, "OK! NOW THINGS WILL GET INTERESTING"

Then shit happened, but it wasn't like "OMG!!!" crazy shit, it was just shit.

Then they went on more adventures.

Then she starts to fall in love, which is cool I guess. However, it felt more like high school love than a real romance.

I can almost hear them arguing over who loves who more.  

Then they start getting weird abilities, and I'm like "OK, we're going to really go somewhere with this, right?!"

Instead it's all like "Whoo! Look what I can do, lets not tell anyone!"

Then we spend several chapters hanging out with friends and comparing notes on Willow's eyes.

... Are you getting the idea?

It's basically this until like the last 4-5 chapters of the book, then things pick up again.

And then you get to the end, and its like:

In short, it had a really strong beginning, and a really strong ending. The middle was just blah to me though. HOWEVER, TO BE FAIR, I think someone who is like 12-15 might enjoy reading this. I think it's just to young for me. There was way to much time spent building the friendships and going on pointless adventures for me to feel really connected. I didn't want to murder any of the charecters with a spork though, so thats a plus.

Additionally, where the book leaves off leaves a very interesting scenario for the next book. Perhaps it will be more fast-paced, edge of your seat than this one is now that all the relationships are established.

BECAUSE I FEEL that it is really a story for younger readers (and at almost 30 I'm definately not a younger reader) I gave it a 3.5, because I feel like someone in the right age group could connect better with the characters and what they are going through. I feel like the friendships that are built might seem more meaningful to them. The adventures that they are going on more exciting. The love interest scenarios more OMG! Blah, blah, blah.

So, if you're into that, by all means, please read it. If you know someone who is a younger reader I wouldn't hesitate to recommend they try it.

I really don't feel like it's a BAD BOOK, I just feel like it's a bad book for ME.